For What It's Worth
by theonlychoice
Summary: A girl, Mamie-Jane (may-me), gets dragged to Tulsa with her family on one of her mother's numerous, so-called escapes from her ex-husband, Damon. She never could have anticipated the destruction that came with it... Just an idea I'm playing with to hopefully improve the quality of writing on this cite
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, guys. So I did a bit of writing on this cite, took a break, and now I'm back. This is just an idea that I'm playing with right now and it could go in a couple different directions. Please let me know if y'll want more, or if it isn't worth it. I do have plans to elaborate the story-line, and as I continue the story I'll elaborate on Mamie's character (which, for anybody who hasn't heard that name before, is a southern name pronounced May-me).**

We were driving in the hot sun, down the highway, out, out, out. I shut my eyes. Behind my eyelids sparked bright fireworks. I opened my eyes again, just in time to see the Florida state welcome sign fall away behind us, already growing smaller with the miles we claimed on this God-forsaken highway.

Lord knows where we were going. I sure didn't know. Mama, who was driving, sure as hell had no idea where we were going. At least, that's what she told me. But it seemed to me like she had a destination in mind. Maybe it wasn't apparent to her now, but somewhere inside her she knew where she was going, just like she always did.

Florida was the place we've stayed in the longest, which was fine by me. I had no problem with the heat or the orange groves. I certainly had no problem with the ocean being so close. My younger sister, Susie, hated Florida. She had allergies that got aggravated by that perpetually sunny state so she stayed indoors most of the time. She didn't have many friends, either - she preferred to be among her Barbies and the cartoons on the television and the Beatles records she kept in her room.

Susie snored, a soft chainsaw right in my ear. Her blonde head was resting on my shoulder, her arm interlocked with mine in a way that should have made her slumber uncomfortable except for the inevitable truth that Susie could sleep anywhere.

We were all together - Mama, Susie, and me - in the cab of a blue Ford that used to belong to Susie's father, Damon. I hated Damon. Mama hated Damon. Susie might be the only person on earth who likes Damon, and I wouldn't understand it except for that he's her father and she still looks at him like he's God himself. My father was back in Mexico somewhere and I never had the chance to look at him the way Susie looks at Damon, but I don't mind it so much anymore.

I looked past Susie, over at Mama. Her hair was flying all in her eyes because the windows were open, but she didn't seem to care. She just kept on driving, lips drawn and eyes squinting against the sun bouncing off the asphalt. She hated sunglasses and all that squinting had left lines at the corners of her eyes, but I like the way they look on her. She must have noticed me staring, because she looked over at me and smiled. I smiled back, even though I didn't want to.

I always hated leaving, which we usually had to do every couple years to avoid Damon. Damon had some kind of vendetta against Mama, even though he had loved her a long time ago. I think he had cheated on Mama once, and then Mama shot him, and now he wants Susie to stay with him, which would never happen. I think that's why we're running now - because Damon got word from Mama's sister, Julie, that we were in Miami. To be truthful, I'm never certain of why we have to leave, except that we do, and Mama always makes it sound important.

I didn't like to think about it too much, because if I did I never came up with any answers. I looked back out the window.


	2. Chapter 2

I really didn't know what to think when we pulled into the place Mama had predestined us to be. So far, I wasn't crazy about Oklahoma. I didn't know why, I just wasn't.

Susie was next to me bouncing in her seat with anticipation. I think she was hoping maybe she could make some friends here, but me, I wasn't so sure. Not about Susie making friends but about me making friends. Susie's a good kid. She would fit in around here, being an all-round American girl. She has the blonde hair, blue eyes thing going for her, but I wasn't sure who would want to be friends with a darker skinned Latina with an accent.

Those doubts swirled in my mind as we drove through Tulsa. I watched all the light skinned kids going by and wondered how I would ever fit in here. Sure, I had friends in Miami, but everybody from there was like me….

We drove through the city on bumpy roads that made the suitcases in the back of the truck jump. _Like Mexican jumping beans,_ Mama would say with a smile. That would always make me think of my father, whose presence in my mind was always the ambiguous and fluid form of some rough-and-tumble cowboy in a bar. After all, that was how Mama said they had met…

I was smiling as I looked out the window at the landscape before me. To our left was a large school built of red brick. There were aged oak trees out front that lined a wide sidewalk for the students, who were all pouring out of the front doors in a frenzy like ants. As I looked closer, I noticed two distinctive categories - those who were dressed in nicer digs, and those who were not. My eyes narrowed as I wondered which group I would belong to, though I had some inkling - I knew what kind of clothes were in my wardrobe.

We continued driving into a more run-down residential area where there were weeds in the lawn and sagging front porches and chain-link fences. I didn't really mind it, though. It wasn't much different than the houses in Miami.

It was only a few minutes before Mama stopped in front of a house when we were deep into the neighborhood. Susie was excited, screaming in our ears "Is this it? Is this it?" and Mama laughed - a sound that cascaded out of her from deep within like fresh stream.

"Yes! This is it!" Mama cried, squeezing Susie's shoulders before taking the key out of the ignition. I just smiled at their antics and got out. The heat was already weighing down on me, but in a kind, enveloping way. Like a hug. Susie slid out after me, and Mama as well.


	3. Chapter 3

That night I lay awake in my bed, unable to sleep. Susie lay in her own bed on the other wall, in a deep slumber and tangled up in her blanket. The house had come with furniture, which was helpful since we didn't have any. Ours was in storage back in Miami, and we could call to have it moved if we wanted to, but that cost too much. It was easier to pay a small monthly fee for the unit.

But that wasn't what was on my mind. The night before I had been at my uncle's house, just across town. He actually lived in a more glamorous part of the city, which must have been why he felt it was okay to do what he did. Mama had driven us there so we could have a place to sleep for the night while she went to a realtor's office to arrange for us to rent a house. It had been alright at first. We had a nice dinner with the family and I got to catch up with cousins I hadn't seen in years. But then we went to bed.

Susie and I were in separate rooms. I guess he had enough rooms for everybody since it was such a large house. That was the problem. I wondered if he would have done it if Susie was with me. I doubted it.

I closed my eyes, tight. My mind was spiraling and every time I let it go I saw him. I saw him, I saw the door open and the light that filtered in from the hallway, his dark form hulking in the door frame and he walked towards me and closer and closer and I wondered why he was doing that what was he going to do? _He got closer and I smelled the aftershave and the scent of lumber because he had been working in the yard earlier, getting closer still. I asked what he was doing, what did he want? And a gleaning white slash appeared as he smiled and with half-lidded eyes sat down on my bed, his weight landing on my leg and I was confused. Did he mean to do that? And his breath landed hot on my face, whispering to me bad things thing I don't want to think about but I can't help it. I moved my face to get away from the awful stink of what we'd had for dinner, but one hand locked in on my face, on my jaw, holding my head right up to his as another had traveled slow down my body. Down, down, down, and I squirmed, so confused, why? All my squirming was for nothing and I could feel his hand..._


	4. Chapter 4

**Please review and let me know what y'all think of the story. Should I continue or not, and please feel free to message me. If you do, I'd love to bounce some ideas off of each other because there are a few different ways this story could go.**

When I woke up it was light outside. My face was squished on its side against my sheets, no doubt leaving a spiderweb of creases on my cheek. My pillow had fallen on the dusty floor during the night and I sighed. My head ached and my face was tight with the feeling of salty tears that had run down my cheeks as I dreamed.

I heard a murmur of voices outside in the driveway. Our walls were thin, and my room was at the front of the house, with the window facing towards the street. I slid out of bed and pulled aside the gauzy certain to see Mama chatting with a blonde lady in a pretty blue house dress. She, the lady, was holding a plate of something. I let the curtain fall back and went to go take a shower.

I was glad Mama was talking to the lady because hopefully they could become friends. Mama never usually had too many friends and I know she gets lonely with just me and Susie to keep her company…

As I was dressing, Mama hollered through the screendoor, "Mamie, come out and say hi!"

I slipped on a pair of shorts and a tank top and went to go meet Mama on the front porch. It was early in the morning, but already the sun was beating down on the landscape, making me squint.

"Mamie, this is Elaina Curtis," Mama introduced, "she and her family lives across the street." I shook her hand. Mrs. Curtis was beautiful, and as soon as I saw her I knew that, when I grew up, I wanted to be like her. It seemed like she just had her life together. Mama told me all about Mrs. Curtis' three sons and how one was my age, and we all stood outside for awhile getting acquainted.

Before she left, Mrs. Curtis looked at me. "If you need anything, honey, just let me know. We're just right across the street," she said with a smile. I smiled back at her.

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you." Mama and Mrs. Curtis shared a knowing glance before our new neighbor turned around and began back to her house with the mowed lawn and flower beds that had patches of tulips. The sun overhead made her blonde hair shine like gold as she walked through her gate, moving with grace in her light blue house dress that complimented her tanned skin. Oh, how I wished I was like her.


End file.
